On the Clean Talk CD, Cliff Barry uses the phrase “the story I tell myself” when it comes time for him to own up to how he is assessing a situation. [Read more…]
Equine-Assisted Shadow Work®
“Believe in your dreams, even when you can’t see the way.” This motto (and potential bumper-sticker) sums up my journey of finding a way to bring my two passions together: Shadow Work® and equine-assisted healing. [Read more…]
JourneyDance™ and Shadow Work®
November 2014, by Sally Bartolameolli
During the last couple of years in facilitation and group work, I’ve wanted to use my body more. It’s taken me many years to risk trusting my physicality and move with joy and less self-consciousness. Today when I am dancing or moving to music, I have many moments strung together when I don’t even consider what I look like or if I am doing it “right.” Pure joy for me.
Through the study of trauma both personally and professionally, I also know that our bodies carry our pain. As a woman recovering from an eating disorder and distorted body image, I know that our issues live in our tissues.
“Trauma causes the body to be in a frozen state of fear, terror and hyper-vigilance and the relationship between trauma and our bodies is very intimate,” says Dr. Bessel A. van der Kolk, a clinical psychiatrist and founder of the Trauma Center in Brookline, Massachusetts. “Fundamentally the effect of trauma is in relationship to one’s body.” I think as individuals working in the emotional healing field for many years, we have known this as well.
I believe we often try hard to “figure out” and understand the painful dynamics and patterns that we carry. It is helpful for our Inner Magician to understand and name some of what is happening for us. I also believe that some of the most powerful release is through the bio-energetics that we experience in Shadow Work® and other conscious dance and movement practices. An added bonus of all the healing and trauma release work I do is that I want to connect freely to my own creativity through writing, art, music and dance as well.
This year I have become certified as a JourneyDance™ facilitator with Toni Bergens. When choosing a conscious dance movement to learn and bring into my Shadow Work® and Trauma Transformation practice, I spoke to the founders of several different somatic modalities. My desire was to find someone who understood what it means to create a safe container and an intentional ritual space. When I spoke with Toni, she noticed I was a Shadow Work® facilitator and asked me if I knew Cliff Barry. Voila! It was easy from there to know my direction, and my experience with Toni as the founder of JourneyDance™ has been gratifying, informative and great fun. Her primary modality is dance. Toni is able to hold space for the deep work that so many are hungry to experience and to create the shame-free container, just as we are trained to do with Shadow Work®. Safety and shame-free are integrated in me, and it was comforting to see Toni’s skill with these values.
As an experiential learner and facilitator, I am so grateful for all the teachers and traditions in my own lineage and for the unique ways that we each weave our own gifts into the sacred work we do as Shadow Work® facilitators. I am looking forward to bringing the conscious practice of JourneyDance™ into all my work and create ritual containers where participants are inspired to release what no longer serves and embrace what is deeply liberating in their own lives.
Sally Bartolameolli, M.Ed., is a Certified Shadow Work® Group Facilitator, author, holistic health counselor, transformational coach, yoga instructor and JourneyDance™ teacher living in Houston, Texas. Visit her website: www.SallyBartolameolli.com.
This article originally appeared in our free email newsletter in November 2014. To subscribe, visit our subscription page.
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Healing the Effects of Trauma with Shadow Work®
November 2014, by Karin Green
As adults, we often don’t remember the physical, mental, and emotional childhood traumas we experienced, but our bodies always remember. As children we store trauma in our bodies. In traumatic moments, where we can’t control what is happening, we make decisions that we hope will protect us, and we make promises to ourselves. The decisions we made were the best ones we could make at the time, but they were based on a child’s understanding, which often doesn’t have the whole picture.
In adulthood, a childhood trauma can manifest in many different ways. For example,
- we might feel as if we’re choking when we try to speak up.
- we might have pain in the stomach when we go into certain situations.
- we might have tight, painful shoulders as if we’re carrying a heavy burden.
- we might have sharp pains in our sexual organs when we’re intimate with someone.
- we might have aching feet when our boundaries have been shattered and we haven’t spoken up for ourselves.
Although I am not a specialist in trauma, I have training in recognizing its presence and assessing whether a person can benefit from doing Shadow Work® or should see a trauma specialist first.
“PULLING OUT” THE TRAUMA
The first step in healing the effects of trauma with Shadow Work is to get clarity and understanding. Shadow Work® is a powerful and helpful resource for discovering the promises we’re still keeping that are bringing us pain, disconnection and suffering.
Once we see more clearly what effects of trauma we are still living with, Shadow Work offers a variety of tools and techniques for healing. One of them is to “pull out” metaphorically what is choking the throat or causing pain in the stomach or feet, or to “throw off” the burden from the shoulders. This work can access the body’s wisdom and release trauma from the body. Once the trauma is out, we can give it back to the one for whom we were carrying it, or we can stomp our feet and set a clear boundary.
As a Shadow Work® facilitator, I have witnessed many people metaphorically “pulling out” trauma and pain and I’m still fascinated at how powerful this technique is and how permanent the healing can be, regardless of what the trauma was or its cause. I have used this process myself to remove a painful stomach ache that would appear every time I had to speak up for myself. After pulling this pain out in a Shadow Work process I no longer have that pain. Today when I do speak up for myself there is a slight discomfort in my stomach, but the pain is gone.
SEXUAL TRAUMA AND THE FOUR ARCHETYPES
Sexual trauma can be more complex, since the perpetrator is often someone we know, and even discussing sexuality is difficult or even a taboo subject for many people. Often the victim of a sexual trauma believes he or she is responsible for what happened, thinking they could have done something to prevent or avoid it. As children it may have been too dangerous for them to say no, so they learned to drop their boundaries. In the Shadow Work® Model, it is the Warrior part of the self that knows where the lines are, and when we bring Warrior energy out of shadow, we learn where our natural boundaries ought to be and how to set them clearly.
In moments of trauma, we felt fear, anger and grief, and those feelings are still with us, in our bodies, preventing us from living our lives fully and joyfully. It is the Lover part of the self that feels, and Shadow Work® provides a safe ritual container for uncovering and releasing these feelings from the body and bringing Lover energy out of shadow.
In childhood, there might not have been anyone truly caring for us and loving us unconditionally. The Sovereign part of the self is our internal parent, and bringing Sovereign energy out of shadow restores our lost self-love and self-esteem.
A child who is the victim of sexual trauma internalizes the voice of the perpetrator, and it can show up in adulthood as a strong inner critic voice that is merciless. It is the Magician part of the self we work with to have a dialogue with the inner critic and transform it, leaving a sense of peace and strength.
Shadow Work® gives us the gift of loving ourselves for the journey we have chosen to live in this life. As we come to understand why we made certain decisions and promises, the ones that got us to where we are today, we can experience great healing and evolve more and more into who we really are.
Karin Green is a Certified Shadow Work® Group Facilitator and transformational coach in central Massachusetts. She offers workshops and individual coaching in person or via Skype. Read more about Karin or visit her website, ShadowWisdom.com, where you can also download the free workbook, Bust Your Inner Critic, Reclaim Your Joy.
This article originally appeared in our free email newsletter in November 2014. To subscribe, visit our subscription page.
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Introduction to Equine-Assisted Shadow Work®
November 2014, by Chrissy McFarren
As a follow-up to the publication of my article on Equine-Assisted Shadow Work® last February, I want to share a few pictures with you of our first one-day Equine-Assisted Shadow Work® workshop at Full Circle on November 16th.
The workshop was for women, and I was the facilitator. We had an amazing turnout, 16 participants, and they were an eclectic mix of horse enthusiasts, therapists, educators, body and energy workers and even a well-known physician. We also had six horses and one donkey join us to help me facilitate.
Our day was a blend of Shadow Work® teaching and equine experiential activities allowing the women to explore the archetypes and their shadows through their interactions with the horses. Despite the cold temperatures, women walked away with new insights and personal knowing.
We are excited to announce that, in addition to our Introduction to Equine-Assisted Shadow Work® workshops, we have developed a new retreat offering called “Shadow Work® through the Way of the Horse and Nature: The Four Quadrants of Relationship.” We will begin offering these retreats in 2015, beginning with a retreat for women in May. Stay tuned for news about men’s and co-ed retreats.
“Thank you for a lovely day on Sunday. I came away with far more insight than I could have imagined and it was an amazing experience.” Katie, shown with equine partner Jesse
Magician altar
Sovereign altar
Lover altar
Warrior altar
Chrissy McFarren is a Certified Shadow Work® Group Facilitator in Coaldale, Colorado.
This article originally appeared in our free email newsletter in November 2014. To subscribe, visit our subscription page.
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Taking Shadow Work® into the Colorado Wilderness with Horses
April 2015, by Chrissy McFarren
For the past eight years, my husband, Dave McFarren, and I have been hosting and facilitating Shadow Work® seminars at our farm in Summit Point, West Virginia, which is about an hour-and-a-half west of Washington, D.C.
One of the things that participants love about being out at the farm is the connection to nature and the horses. During any given Shadow Work® weekend, some of our processes are bound to end up outside for a blessing or for the anchoring part of the process.
Because we have a bunkhouse at the farm, many participants also stay at the farm while attending one of our seminars, which gives them the opportunity to connect in a less formal way outside the container of the seminar. In the evenings, we often have a bonfire, conversation and music. It has been wonderful to witness the healing that happens during a Shadow Work® weekend and share the joy that participants feel when they stay here on the farm. It is clear to us that all of this was a stepping stone to our next chapter in Shadow Work®.
At the end of April 2015, we will become co-owners of Badger Creek Ranch, a working cattle and small guest ranch in the high plains of central Colorado.
The Ranch is completely surrounded by state and BLM land and holds a lease on 4,000 surrounding acres.
Our dream of having a retreat location in Colorado is the result of years of doing our own Shadow Work®, embracing our dreams, letting go, risking and believing. The blessing of this new chapter in our lives is that we get to share it with Shadow Work® participants. We will now be able to take Shadow Work® into the wilderness.
Dave and I are also blessed to co-own this ranch with a couple who are already on the Board of Directors for our nonprofit, Full Circle Farm Growth and Healing Center. Brian is a wilderness specialist and Natalie holds an M.A. in Eco-Psychology.
The four of us have crafted a four-day retreat, “Shadow Work® through the Way of the Horse and Nature: Exploring the Four Directions of Relationship.” Each day of the retreat is devoted to one of the four archetypal directions on which the Shadow Work® Model is based. The day is a blend of teaching, experiential wilderness processes, equine-assisted processes, riding (optional), and meditation.
Our intention for this four-day retreat is to fully integrate and anchor the four archetypes through the power of nature and the wisdom of the horses. We believe that when we open our senses to nature, get quiet and listen, we can remember to be aware, stand in our truth, bless and love. Our prayer is that each participant leaves the retreat fully alive and awake.
We are very excited to be offering two retreats during our first season at the ranch in 2015. One will be for men in August and the other will be for women in September. Our retreat flyers will be available soon at the non-profit website. In the meantime, if you’re interested, feel free to give us a call.
Chrissy McFarren is a Certified Shadow Work® Group Facilitator in Coaldale, Colorado.
This article originally appeared in our free email newsletter in April 2015. To subscribe, visit our subscription page.
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Following The Arc Of Facilitation
June 2015, by Becky Schupbach
In a novel or a play, we use the concept of an arc to describe how the story and action unfold. The arc describes the development or resolution of the narrative or principle theme. I believe that the concept of an arc is also a useful way to approach Shadow Work® Carpetwork or other process work. When I am facilitating, I watch for the development and intersection of three separate arcs: the story arc, the spatial arc and the energetic arc. Each arc describes a felt sense of rising action, crisis and resolution.
THE STORY ARC
The story arc describes the issue or theme of the work and the way in which the participant chooses to work with it. When we ask a Shadow Work® participant what she wants to have happen, we are asking for the story. It also describes the block that is getting in the way. It may also include the people in her life who are a part of the pattern or who are caught up in the issue with her.
If a participant tells us she wants to live courageously in spite of negative self-judgments, we will explore the meaning of living courageously for her, the nature of her negative self-judgments, and when and from whom she learned them. These pieces of information inform and guide the process. They are a part of her story on multiple levels. They may represent what actually happened to her, but more importantly, they represent the story she is telling herself about her life or her situation.
By hearing her story, we learn what beliefs or old patterns oppose her forward movement. The block or resistance she faces represents the dramatic element of crisis or conflict. Once we have the elements of story as they show up in her history or her beliefs about herself, we can move the story forward in time toward a resolution that may change its trajectory. Thus, whether she ultimately chooses to confront those who taught her the negative messages or transform her inner critic or bring support for the one who wishes to live courageously, she is living her new story into the world. The unfolding of her new story moves the story arc of the process to resolution.
Some approaches to facilitation discourage too much sharing of story, particularly when the time allowed for process work is limited. It is certainly true that a participant can become so involved in telling his story that he does not move forward to change it. However, we should not underestimate the power of allowing the participant to speak his story aloud and be heard by the facilitators and other participants. Graceful and empathetic facilitation allows the participant to share his story line and uses it to co-create a process that fits the forward action of his story through crisis toward resolution.
THE SPATIAL ARC
The spatial arc describes how the process is set up on the carpet and how it moves through space. Paying attention to the spatial arc allows us to see the ways in which the position of the role-players relative to each other or the physical action of the process intensifies the energetic arc. We also notice that physically moving into different places on the carpet may also allow a Shadow Work® participant to get in touch with different parts of him/herself.
Sometimes the spatial arc of the process is dramatic and sometimes it is subtle. For example, when a participant expresses his anger and physically moves across the carpet, we see the spatial arc of his process in an obvious way. However, when a participant takes on a posture that represents the sad or frightened child self, a physical movement happens that reflects both the story and the energy of the process. To extend the theater metaphor, the facilitators serve as the directors of the process by encouraging the participant to position himself and his role players and to move and interact in ways that deepen and serve the process.
THE ENERGETIC ARC
The energetic arc describes the emotional trajectory of the process toward an end-point of emotional release. It involves the build of energy as the process unfolds. As with the spatial arc, it may be obvious or subtle. For example, we may notice a Shadow Work participant move from a powerful energetic expression of anger to tears of deep grief or relief. Or we may notice a subtle relaxation or softening of the participant’s body and face following a grief or support process. We watch as the dramatic tension of the process builds to an emotional climax, followed by an energetic or emotional release. Paying close attention to facial and body changes allows the facilitator to recognize when the participant has experienced the release.
We believe that encouraging a Shadow Work® participant to feel and integrate this energetic shift transforms old patterns of behavior or old stories which no longer serve the participant. For this reason, we give the participant time to sink into the energetic release and feel it fully. At this point, we refrain from asking him to tell us what he is feeling or posing other questions which will prematurely take him from his heart to his head. We encourage him to stay with his emotions and feelings by remaining silent or perhaps by quietly affirming with words like “yes . . . yes.” We simply watch him until we see him beginning to surface on his own from the depths of his feelings. After that, we guide him to express his intellectual understanding and awareness of what happened in the process as a further step toward integration and anchoring the energetic shift.
Using the elements of theater can help us describe how a Shadow Work® process unfolds. However, as facilitators, we do not want the process to be a performance. We want to create an experience that is both symbolic and real for the participant. By following the story, spatial and energetic arcs of a participant’s work, we interact with the participant in the moment to co-create a transformative experience based upon the issues, feelings and reactions as we see them unfold before us.
Becky Schupbach is a certified Shadow Work® Group Facilitator and Coach in Louisville, Kentucky. Read more about Becky.
This article originally appeared in our free email newsletter in July 2015. To subscribe, visit our subscription page.
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